In the Waiting

Photo by Ümit Bulut on Unsplash

Praise be Jesus Christ.  Praise be His most Holy Name.  Praise be Him who was, who is, and who is to come.  Praise Him always!

Thank You, God, for all thy benefits.  Thank You for Your provision, Your timing, Your mercy and love.  Thank You for the gentle way you stretch our faith and understanding. 

We are so sorry, Lord, for our sins.  We are sorry when we are prideful, and we are stubborn.  We are sorry for our selfishness and short-sightedness and impatience.  So many times have we failed to love You as we should.  

It is no coincidence that God would lead me to reflect on waiting during Holy Week.  The Church herself has been waiting – tis the season! As I type this, I am waiting for a phone call involving a stressful situation with my father.  It has me remembering how I am naturally an impatient person.  Lately though, I have almost found myself looking forward to waiting.  

It seems God has slowly revealed to me that He is in the waiting!  In the waiting is when I seem to be open to His still small voice.  In the waiting is when He seems to reveal Himself and His will.  In the waiting is when He seems to stretch me and form me.  He seems to teach me in the waiting!

Waiting on the Lord used to be so difficult and frustrating, yet lately, I can honestly say that I almost look forward to waiting on Him to answer prayer, for His plan to unfold, for an answer to be revealed.  It is in the waiting that I “get out of God’s way.”  I try not to force solutions or rush decisions or overreact – I wait; I pray; I listen; I search.  

This is a pretty huge difference from how I used to wait.  I am a natural planner, organizer, and solution finder. People like me do not naturally just sit back and let God be God.  I guess I have experienced enough now to know - really know - that I can plan, organize, and solve all I want, but if what I have planned, organized and solved are not in alignment with God’s will, none of it will quite “work out”.  I have experienced enough now to know - to really know - that waiting is many times more productive than jumping straight into the planning, organizing, and solving.  Waiting is not easy, but it is in the waiting that our faith is practiced!  

I have been so blessed this school year to have most Wednesdays as a day that I can sit in Adoration.  Recently, I sat and just unloaded all that I was carrying onto Him.  Then, I waited.  I sensed Him saying to me, “ I AM always the answer…” 

Then a song popped into my mind.  “If I Could Just Sit With You a While” by Mercy Me

When I can not feel

When my wounds don't heal

Lord I humbly kneel

Hidden in You

Lord you are my life

So I don't mind to die

Just as long as I

Am hidden in You

Cause I could just sit with You awhile

You could just hold me

nothing can touch me

though I'm wounded

though I've died

If I could just sit with You awhile

I'de need You to hold me

Moment by moment 'till forever passes by

He seemed to say to me, “I am in the moment.  I am even in the waiting and the lesson.  I am the cause of the moment.  I am between the moments — I am always present.” 

I pray your lent - this period of waiting - has been fruitful.  I pray that the next time you find yourself waiting, you use that time to “get out of God’s way” by not trying to control or force solutions, to pray, to discern, to listen.  You never know how God will use those moments in the waiting.  

When He does use those moments, do not forget to share with others how He is in the waiting.  You never know who needs to hear it.